Hey all- I wanted to share some thoughts on something close to my heart: taking children to traditional New England social dances and/or encouraging your school to host dances or have someone come in to talk about them.
Adults know how much fun these dances are, but have you ever thought about the impact they can have on children? These gatherings are more than just an evening of fun—they offer valuable lessons for children’s mental, emotional, and social development.
One of the most special things about traditional New England social dances is their deep roots in history. Bringing children to these events helps them connect with a part of our cultural heritage. In an age of fast-paced technology, these dances remind us of the simpler, slower, and more meaningful ways people once gathered to celebrate life. Especially if you and your family live in New England. These dances are simple enough for anyone.
By engaging in this tradition, children learn historical empathy—the ability to connect emotionally with people of the past. They see firsthand how communities came together through music, dance, and shared rituals, which builds an understanding and appreciation for the way life used to be. They’re stepping into a living history lesson, gaining insights into how people interacted in a time before screens dominated our social world.
Dancing has always been a way to lift the spirits, and this is no different for children. The lively tunes, laughter, and camaraderie of these dances provide an instant mood boost. Dancing releases endorphins, helping children reduce anxiety and stress, much like it does for us adults. It’s physical activity that’s disguised as fun, which keeps them active and engaged without it feeling like exercise. I might also add that in our modern day the children’s mental health is even more at a tipping point.
Beyond that, the structure of the dances helps children develop focus, memory, and problem-solving skills. They listen to the caller, learn new patterns, and follow along with their partners—all of which encourage a healthy mindset of perseverance and learning.
Traditional New England dances are inherently social, and that’s one of the best things about them for children. They’ll learn the value of eye contact, respectful greetings, and cooperative movement. Some dances begin with small gestures—like a handshake or bow—which teaches manners in a way that’s both fun and deeply rooted in tradition. It reinforces the importance of kindness and respect when interacting with others, something that’s vital for social development. Respect is key, and they learn that quickly. They learn that dancing with their any-age partner requires adaptability, depending on how fast they swing, or what pace feels comfortable to both parties. These dances teach children how to collaborate. They must work together with their partners and the group to make the dance flow, fostering cooperation and teamwork. There’s no competition here, just pure, collective enjoyment. Simplicity at its finest.
The Importance of Physical Touch
Physical touch is an essential part of our lives, and for children, it’s important they learn healthy, respectful ways to engage with others. Traditional New England social dances offer a unique opportunity for children to experience innocent physical touch in a safe, structured environment. Holding hands during a balance or swing, offering a hand to their partner—these small, simple gestures create a sense of trust and connection.
Research shows that physical touch can reduce anxiety, build empathy, and enhance emotional well-being. In the context of these dances, it’s all about connection, fostering a sense of belonging, and feeling safe in the group. Children experience the joy of touch without any discomfort, learning how to respect boundaries while still forming meaningful bonds with others.
Encouraging Emotional & Social Growth
The beauty of traditional New England social dances is how they nurture emotional intelligence. As children dance with different partners, they develop flexibility, adaptability, and confidence in their social interactions. These dances offer a safe space for them to practice these skills without the pressures of everyday life.
Children also learn to communicate nonverbally through the movement of the dance, honing their ability to read social cues. It’s an environment where they can grow socially in a joyful, supportive setting, away from screens and distractions. It can also help to improve their attention spans.
One of the most profound lessons children learn at these dances is the value of teamwork. Everyone at the dance is working together to make the patterns flow smoothly. It’s not about individual performance; it’s about the shared experience. When children work together with their partners and the larger group, they’re learning how to cooperate and contribute to something bigger than themselves.
This teamwork extends beyond the dance floor and helps children in all areas of life—from school to friendships to other activities. It’s a chance for them to experience the joy of community and realize how their actions affect others.
“Alright, alright, this is great,” you say, “but my kids have to get to bed”
Firstly, some dances are a little bit earlier in the evening, especially family dances. But, if you are still hemming and hawing, as is expected, I know, we try to keep children on a schedule, but it’s sometimes okay to bend the rules every once in a while. Letting them stay up a bit late for an evening of old-time New Hampshire dancing is worth it. They’ll fall asleep afterward with smiles on their faces and memories they’ll carry with them for years to come. I’m sure in the past that children either fell asleep on a nearby bench or curled up in a corner- and in our modern day it is even more of a special experience for them to experience this wonder.
Experiences like this teach them that sometimes, it’s okay to let go of routine for something special. It’s a small sacrifice for the joy, learning, and sense of belonging they’ll gain from the evening…and I guarantee they’ll sleep well.
Traditional New England social dances have been a part of our heritage for generations, and there’s a reason they’ve endured. They bring people together in a way that few other activities do. When we bring children into this world of music and movement, we’re not only teaching them the steps of the dance, but also passing on the values of community, kindness, and respect.
So, consider bringing your children to a dance. They’ll gain a deeper understanding of our shared history while developing essential life skills that will serve them for years to come.
If you feel your children would benefit from this in their education, bring it up to your school activities board. Can’t hurt to encourage them to find someone to talk/run a dance at their school or homeschool co-op. These can also be earlier in the day and can definitely be more friendly for the younger littles.
As a graduated happy homeschooler I have to address my homeschooling families- If you take the children out enough, it counts as a PE credit and potentially a history credit depending on how you approach it and study it!
Let’s keep this wonderful tradition alive—one joyful swing and balance at a time.
Until next time, keep your feet close to the floor and your hearts open to the music!
— Rivkah Valley
